Hello, everybody! This is Ava West and, if you're like me, then you get tired of hearing editors, critique partners, beta readers use those dreaded three words when reading your book. I see that in their notes and I throw my hands up in the air and have to walk away for a minute. Or at least I did. Now, I don't see those words nearly as much, but I still see other authors struggling when figuring out that big question, "To show or to tell?" I have complied a list of four tips that any author in any genre can use when dealing with this stage of the writing or self-editing process, but first, a warning.
I am a romance author so my experience stems from the genre of romance with a dash of fight scenes and suspense.
#1: "There's a time and place for everything."
This is one saying I think of when trying to decide whether or not to skimp on the details. Not every paragraph or every page needs extensive detail. This is your party, your book baby, and no one knows it better than you do. It was born in your imagination and you decide the pace of each scene. For example, if you are writing a soft, sweet love scene, you can either glaze over it with minor detail or you can slow the scene down with sensual, loving details which will captivate your reader.
#2: Set The Pace
On my last point, you saw me mention pacing the scene. Think of the pacing of the scene as how long it takes the reader to read it. The more detail, the longer it takes. A slow scene is one with a lot of detail, very in depth, while a fast scene is one with little to no detail. Usually the only time this is not the case is when there is an explanation of events or a backstory described. You want the pace to match the scene. For example, a fight scene is fast paced, scary, gripping. This should be communicated with the pace of the story. During a fight scene, the reader probably doesn't care about how worn down the fighter's shoes look or even how the lights are flickering while these two opponents are trying to fight for their life. Keep that in mind.
#3: Don't Info Dump!
I'm too embarrassed to admit how many times I have skipped a section of a book just because there was three to ten pages of descriptions of the ceiling, the curtains, the cracks in the cement. The readers don't care about the hundreds of books in the library. (Okay, maybe we do a little.) The point is an info dump loses the readers focus. Info dumping is not the same as showing.
#4: Channel The Mood
The mood of the scene means everything. Your adjectives should be communicating this to your readers. Is your male lead proposing to your female lead? Use words like loving, beautiful, grateful. Words that inspire positivity.
Here is a test. Which sentence shows and which one tells?
Sentence 1: "My chest tightened at the sight of her gray, desiccated flesh."
Sentence 2: "I was sad that she died."
Both sentences successfully communicate what is happening but only one of them provides the feeling that comes with "showing". Which one is showing?
If you said Sentence 1, you're correct. "My chest tightened" signifies either anxiety or heartbreak. This person is obviously sad by what is happening and that is further added by the word "gray" which adds to the down mood. "Desiccated" means dried out and is usually used to describe a dead body. The word "flesh" further pushes the point home that this person is dead. Flesh is usually used to describe wounds and is used a lot to dehumanize something sensitive, like a dead body. A lot of information could be pulled from that one sentence that was lacking in the other one without using an info dump and it kept the reader's attention.
"I was sad that she died" is flat, lifeless, and completely without emotion. You can't feel what the narrator does and this is a scene you would expect to be slowed down with detail.
Thank you for joining me this week. I post new content on Mondays and my presale giveaway is still going on. Order a copy of Somethin' Kinda Wonderful and send me your proof of purchase to be entered to win a ton of prizes. It releases on Valentine's Day and the cover reveal for my next release, Xander, will be happening the same day in my Facebook group, Ava's Naughties.
I'll have more for you next week. Toodles!